Thursday, May 29, 2008

Last call!

It's been a long abscence, but I'm back! Mostly due to the fact that I finally have a computer! I know, it's only 2008. I have to keep up with the times, here people! So, I now own a beautiful dell inspiron. I don't know exactly what that means in computer performance terms, but it sure looks pretty and seems to work well. And now I own powerpoint. I know, it's a dream come true! Who doesn't want powerpoint of there own! Alright, enough about this....


Last night was my last call of residency. Over the years, when I tell people that I'm on call, there are different interpretations. I've found myself having to explain over and over that call means staying in the hospital 24-30 hours at a stretch. Then I have to explain how that is possible and blah blah blah. After 4 years, I finally took my last call. I was sitting back in the call room thinking about how many calls I probably took over 4 years. If I say that on average I took about 4 calls a month over a 4 year period, then I probably took about 200 calls. That's 200 nights spent at the hospital, time that I'll never get back. But, it's 200 nights where my skills were tested to the max. Where I learned how to be a doctor, and how to take care of patients, how to talk to patients and their families. How to be realistic with them, give hope, or deliver the worst news possible. That's a lot of time.



When I was an intern, I remember feeling nervous everytime it was time for call. Every page I received would worry me, and I would worry about the patients endlessly. Somewhere, probably around year 3, I kind of lost that nervous feeling as I became more comfortable with my role. I still worried about the patients, but I was more confident in what was expected of me and my decision making skills. One of my old friends from residency used to get very wound up and nervous every call. Finally, around year 2 she stopped and said to me, "what is the worst thing that can happen. I'm not going to die, some of the patients might, but I'm not going to die." I think this about sums up how it feels to be an inexperienced resident on call. As I finished up this last call I began thinking about what the future holds. No more in house call, but I will still need to take home call. I know that I will be nervous again, as I was 4 years ago when it comes to call, but at least I will not die! What I really look forward to is a little more time outside the hosptal (maybe)!

About Me

Chicago, IL, United States